dear baby a,

hey. it's me again. last time we talked, i was feeling kind of bad about all the things i hadn't done for you {and by you, i really mean me} and was feeling like a slacker. i'm over that. i just can't wait for you to be here. which you will be. tomorrow actually. {as long as everything goes as planned.}

i'm 5 centimeters dilated and 90% effaced and have been for quite some time. not to mention, you dropped like a month ago and i've been able to feel your hiccups in my butt ever since. pregnancy is weird. apparently, you are your father's child and are just a little bit stubborn. ;) i'm kidding. i'm pretty sure i'm the stubborn one in the relationship. glad to know you inherited something from me. i kind of wish you'd just pop right on out on your own, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen any time soon. the docs suggest we force ya out ourselves and as much as i wanted it all to happen naturally, it's sounding better and better by the day. especially as i sit here typing this with my arms fully extended, trying to soften the little number your feet and rear end are doing on my ribs. not pleasant. but in all honesty, i think i'm going to miss those jabs and the closeness we've shared these last nine months. it really has been just about everything i hoped it could be.

i feel like i've had it pretty easy with you. sure, you made me quit my job and put me on bed rest at 32 weeks, only to laugh in our face as you teeter on going over your due date. but i really can't complain much. i mean heck, just yesterday, i went floating down the river with your pops and aunt arika. {thanks for deciding not to make your big debut then, by the way. that coulda been awkward.} i don't think very many prego chicks get to do that every day.

i have high hopes for what things are going to be like when you're here. i'd be lying if i said it's going to be easy to let go of the 'zach and sarah' duo that has existed for the last two and a half years. we've kind of loved being able to fly by the seat of our pants and do whatever we want on a whim. but i am so so excited to make it a trio, come tomorrow. we're going to be best friends. all three of us. and that flying by the seat of your pants thing? we don't expect that to change much, so come ready, little girl.

and before i go, i should probably let you in on a little secret - you've got one amazing dad. between all the camping trips and tea parties he's already got planned for you, i'm hoping you guys will still have time to hang out with me. he is so stinking excited to meet you. he tells you that almost every day. he's already making plans on what gun to buy that will be most intimidating to the boys who want to date you. don't worry. i'll only let him pull that card until you're 25. he loves you to death already, sweet pea!

and as for you and i? just expect us to be that mom and daughter that has to talk about everything and doesn't get sick of it. i'm sitting here in your nursery on my last night as a not mom and as terrified as i am for the trials of parenthood, i can't wait to meet you little bean. bring on the crazy adventure!

-your mama

p.s. it's a full moon tomorrow. try not to let that turn you into a weirdo.